i know better

I am so mad at myself right now.  I don’t know what is wrong with me.  I learned a long time ago not to anticipate anything that was controlled by another person because almost all of the time you will just be highly disappointed.  If you build up something in your mind it only leads to a different reality that is never equal to what you had imagined.  It is better not to have any expectations so that you could be pleasantly surprised by whatever happens and it can be great or fun or okay but without the build-up it is just an experience, for better or for worse. 

Over a month ago you kept asking me what I was doing for spring break and did I want to go with you to Atlanta over spring break.  I told you I had plans and you said see if I could get one of the weekends on either end of the week free for Atlanta.  As it happened my plans fell through and I chose the latter weekend.  You kept talking about where we could go and how much fun we would have.  We had to go to One, your favorite restaurant and then The Flying Biscuit, which was next to a great record store I would like and you knew where I would just love to take pictures and we could go to The Mart and the Atlanta Botanical Gardens.  It would just be fabulous.  But, I would have to find some place for “little bit” to go. 

Fast forward to today…it is spring break.  I have dumped little bit with my parents.  I get some weird text about how it’s just going to be me and you in Atlanta.  Okay, when over the last six weeks did you ever say it wasn’t going to just be me and you?  Now, it has become some world-wind shopping on Friday only and we have to come right back Friday night and not do anything else that you had said we were going to do and you have plans on Saturday you have to get back for.  

Why did you even ask me to go?  You invited me and then made plans with another person.  You invited me over a month ago.  Why did you tell me all these great things we were going to do that we are not going to do?    I have been looking forward to this trip.  Dammit I got sucked in and didn’t even see it coming.  I am just sad because I thought you were better than that.