some people

the older i get the more i see the same people over and over again...you know, you have met that personality before...maybe it has different hair color this time around but, basically there are so many similarities and lucky for you, you already know how to deal with this person...occasionally you do have the opportunity to meet someone completely original-which i think is fabulous because seeing copies of personalities are a bit boring-granted, if you are sadistic you can play with people's minds...not that i would condone this activity...but i sure it would be amusing to some...i like to think of myself as an original that you just can peg or understand right away or maybe never for that matter...i am full of contradictions but, i think that is what makes me-me and i like that...so far i have only found one other person in this universe that gets me 100% and can finish my sentences and can look into my eyes and know exactly what i am thinking...so, in my book, i am doing good at being an enigma.

so, in saying all this, i cannot for the life of me understand the motivation of some people...usually, i am really good at cutting through all the bs and seeing things for what they really are...unless someone is just too close to me, i can tend to be a little blind to that or not really want to see what i see...but, in general i am pretty good at seeing things...but, for instance i have been trying to keep a relationship with aunt...but, she seems to relish being able to tell my mother [her sister] anything that i say that she might not like to hear or that she might consider shocking or that might make my mother feel like a failure at being a mom...and maybe it's just her issues and i am just her pawn to get at my mother but, i really hate being stuck in the middle of a game of chess that i never wanted to play...i hate having to think about everything i post online or say on the phone or in person that might get twisted and repeated...and it is never just repeated verbatim...there is always some twisting of my words that makes me look in a bad light some way or that makes things appear worse to my mother...and for a while she would just believe all the shit her sister said without checking with me first and then be mad at me and i wouldn't understand what the hell was going on...see why i don't want to be in this game of chess? so, my question...would you just stop talking to your aunt? would you start strategically telling her outrageous bullshit just so she would repeat it to your mother? would you just tell her off? i am not sure how i am gonna handle this one...